Joy in the Journey

My friend's recent blog post reminded me of something I've been thinking about for a while.  Its about finding joy in the journey.  Way back in August, when I found out I was pregnant, it was definitely a surprise.  And a shock.     And while I certainly felt those things (along with nervousness, nausea, and worry) mostly what I felt was happiness.  I even felt a little giddy about the whole thing.  How could I have known, in that moment, that I would only have 20 short weeks with my little guy?  But what I am so grateful for, is that I didn't spend even one minute feeling sad, one minute feeling angry or one minute upset about the fact that I was having a baby.  That baby.  My baby.

 I know some people do feel that way or have felt that way and I don't in any way mean this to be a criticism of them.  I feel that the experiences we have are here to teach us something, and those mothers had something entirely different to learn from their experiences than I did.  And part of what I think I needed to learn, was to find joy in the journey.  To find joy in the unexpected, joy in the hardships and joy even amidst the trials.

 It's something I'm still learning, as a Mother.  So much about motherhood is "lather, rinse, repeat."  The same dishes have to be loaded, the same clothes have to be washed, the same rooms have to be cleaned, the same toys have to be picked up.  Every day.  Sometimes its hard to see forward progress when you're stuck on the repeat cycle.  But there is joy to be found in those things.  I don't always see it.  But dishes to wash, rooms to clean--all mean that we are living.  It means we are still here and we still have work to do.  And I love that.

I think Sister Hinckley summed it up best: "I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully, tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long, perfectly manicured fingernails.  I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the wheels from taking kids to scout camp.  I want to be there with a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbors children.  I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone's garden.  I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder.  I want the Lord to know I was really here and that I really lived."


And that is finding Joy in the Journey.