elise is big on standards and what is right & wrong. we've been talking about modesty and it has made a big impression. one of the first days of school she was telling me about who all brought applesauce for their lunches. she goes, "i had applesauce, abigail had applesauce, and immodest girl had applesauce." the way she said it made it sound like "immodest girl" was some sort of superhero (or maybe super villian, as the case would be). it was so funny. but i was proud of her for paying attention.
she also told me that her teacher's aide has two earrings in each ear. she wondered why she did that since president hinckly said it was wrong. i told her that she'd probably not heard of president hinckley and so she didn't know it was wrong. so elise said, "well, i'll have to tell her about him so she'll know. then she can take her earrings out." it was just so matter of fact for her.
cory has instituted a "turn it off" policy. if there is ever something bad on tv the rule is to turn it off right then. the same goes for the internet. or if you are around something bad, you are supposed to walk away. kind of how joseph ran from potiphar's wife. anyway, this has left a lasting impression with elise and she talks about it frequently. the other weekend cory's parents were here and had the tv on. elise walked by while a commercial was on. apparently she saw something immodest on it. just to be fair, the show they were watching was totally appropriate, but there was something immodest on one of the commercials. you know how they like to slip things in...and if there is something immodest or inappropriate, elise will catch it. it could be a sleeveless shirt and she will see it. we affectionately call her our morality monitor.
the other thing elise is fiercely against is "smoke". this means cigars, cigarettes, pipes...whatever. they are all called "smoke". she will not even step on one that has fallen on the ground. some workers had come to our house the other day and had smoked in the yard and left the butts in the driveway. elise spotted them right off and was furious. we had to get paper towels and pick them up to throw them away. but even that was a challenge, as she wanted no part of them, even at that range. the other morning she saw one across the road from her school where we had parked to walk her in. cory stepped on it and elise let him know it. you would have thought he had stepped on a rattlesnake. it was really funny and cute.
so, in some ways, she might have taken things a step too far. but i have to say, i'm glad she has. i want her to understand what is right and what is wrong and not be afraid to stand up for what she believes in. so far, she seems to be on the right track. maybe we all could stand to be a little more like that at times or regarding certain things. she's definitely made me think about where i stand on things.
Sarah's Harry Potter Birthday Party
12 years ago
3 rays of sunshine:
What a wonderful example Elise is! I am so proud of her! Sort of reminds me of our "Don't Do Drugs" kid! :) ...and I think you all set a good example of standing up for what you believe in. I think it was obvious to those around you that you had standards.
That is great! I should work a little harder at that around here. Utah is interesting because it is most likely a given that other people know and espouse your standards, but a lot of times they don't. I have a hard time finding the words because we have really good friends who have visible tatoos, and Shawn has a couple of family members who smoke and a sister who doesn't dress modestly. I want my kids to know that more is expected of them, and that those things are very definitely wrong, but that we shouldn't be harsh to those who are not observing those commandments. I usually say "He/She doesn't know how much Heavenly Father and Jesus love them. If they knew, they wouldn't do those things." Unfortunately, I don't know if that is true, especially with a powerful addiction. What a crazy world it is.
i have a hard time with that too--of explaining that we love the person but not what they're doing. and i want her to be righteously judgmental (or discerning) in what is right, but not critical of the person doing it. but that's hard for me to explain.
i can imagine the challenge in utah, too. i always found that even though i had member friends who made bad choices, i never felt pressure from them to do the same because they knew where i stood and where i was coming from. but that can be confusing, too, especially for a child. to see them at church and then see them out doing something inappropriate.
being a parent is tough...
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